Gabe doesn't have many American influences beyond his family. In some ways, our lifestyle is a wonderful opportunity to see and appreciate the wide world. But in another way, I see how we are laying the foundation for an ultimate sense of rootlessness. We try to help him appreciate and love his home country, not for America itself, but to give him a sense of who he is and where he comes from. Our community here in Southeast Asia, though strong and relatively stable, is somewhat ephemeral and will likely not be here in the same form when he is trying to establish himself as an adult. For that reason, we want him to feel comfortable and grounded in the country and the family that he is likely to return to at some point in the next decade. However, at such a distance it's easy for it to seem foreign and uninteresting. I know that it's important to see heaven as our only home, but I also think God made us to feel a bond to our families and our roots. I see many 3rd culture kids struggle as they try to find their place sometimes they fail. I'm never sure how to handle this issue. I don't know whether to talk to Gabe most about the potential difficulties of his situation, thus leading him to believe that he is at a disadvantage (which I don't ultimately believe is true) and different than others or to emphasize that benefits of his varied life and risk leaving him feeling guilty if he feels out of place when he returns the States. It's a dilemma I haven't been able to solve in the 9 years I've been thinking about it.
Monday, February 21, 2011
My 3rd culture kid
Gabe doesn't have many American influences beyond his family. In some ways, our lifestyle is a wonderful opportunity to see and appreciate the wide world. But in another way, I see how we are laying the foundation for an ultimate sense of rootlessness. We try to help him appreciate and love his home country, not for America itself, but to give him a sense of who he is and where he comes from. Our community here in Southeast Asia, though strong and relatively stable, is somewhat ephemeral and will likely not be here in the same form when he is trying to establish himself as an adult. For that reason, we want him to feel comfortable and grounded in the country and the family that he is likely to return to at some point in the next decade. However, at such a distance it's easy for it to seem foreign and uninteresting. I know that it's important to see heaven as our only home, but I also think God made us to feel a bond to our families and our roots. I see many 3rd culture kids struggle as they try to find their place sometimes they fail. I'm never sure how to handle this issue. I don't know whether to talk to Gabe most about the potential difficulties of his situation, thus leading him to believe that he is at a disadvantage (which I don't ultimately believe is true) and different than others or to emphasize that benefits of his varied life and risk leaving him feeling guilty if he feels out of place when he returns the States. It's a dilemma I haven't been able to solve in the 9 years I've been thinking about it.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
A Quiet Thanksgiving
"I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set aside and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens."-Thanksgiving Proclamation, Abraham Lincoln
This is probably the quietest Thanksgiving I've ever had. With nearly everyone we know out of town for the week, Eric in Korea for a conference and Gabe sick, we won't be celebrating Thanksgiving with a big meal. Also, Cambodia is unusually quiet today as we observe a day of mourning for the tragedy on Monday. It's circumstances like this that reduce a holiday to original reason for celebrating. In this case, it's gratitude. And I do feel gratitude. Yesterday I was feeling very alone as I cared for Gabe who was very ill and worried about how I would get him to the doctor or get more medicine if I needed to. I worried about who would help me if I got sick as our neighbors and closest friends are out of town. But then both Eric's and my parents called and promised to pray and one of the few friends left in town dropped by with some Sprite for Gabe. Today, I woke up feeling grateful: grateful that I feel fine, grateful that Gabe is feeling a bit better, grateful for the prayers. I also feel grateful that no one I know or love died on Monday. And I'm grateful for family and good friends, two (mostly) healthy kids and a good God. So this morning I sat with the kids and thanked God for all He does for us. It was a good Thanksgiving.
This is probably the quietest Thanksgiving I've ever had. With nearly everyone we know out of town for the week, Eric in Korea for a conference and Gabe sick, we won't be celebrating Thanksgiving with a big meal. Also, Cambodia is unusually quiet today as we observe a day of mourning for the tragedy on Monday. It's circumstances like this that reduce a holiday to original reason for celebrating. In this case, it's gratitude. And I do feel gratitude. Yesterday I was feeling very alone as I cared for Gabe who was very ill and worried about how I would get him to the doctor or get more medicine if I needed to. I worried about who would help me if I got sick as our neighbors and closest friends are out of town. But then both Eric's and my parents called and promised to pray and one of the few friends left in town dropped by with some Sprite for Gabe. Today, I woke up feeling grateful: grateful that I feel fine, grateful that Gabe is feeling a bit better, grateful for the prayers. I also feel grateful that no one I know or love died on Monday. And I'm grateful for family and good friends, two (mostly) healthy kids and a good God. So this morning I sat with the kids and thanked God for all He does for us. It was a good Thanksgiving.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
Cold Snap
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Traveling back to Phnom Penh
Last week we returned to Phnom Penh in stages:
150 miles on Monday
2000 miles on Wednesday
6779 miles on Friday
1433 miles on Saturday
This strategy worked well-Gabe and Molly both travelled very well.
150 miles on Monday
2000 miles on Wednesday
6779 miles on Friday
1433 miles on Saturday
This strategy worked well-Gabe and Molly both travelled very well.
Wednesday, June 02, 2010
Wedding on Koh Chang
Getting out of the city was pretty easy and we only hit traffic once we came to the garment factory district. It's hard to appreciate the size of the garment industry in Cambodia until you see the mass-migration of workers in the morning. Most workers don't have their own vehicles and get to work by a variety of means. Many are taken by truck (the truck pictured was huge and it's standing-room only. Thousands upon thousands walk. Some are on the back of land-barges pulled by tractors. Cambodia has touted its garment industry as the humane choice of employment for its workers. I don't know if it's true or not, but I do know there are many, many jobs I've seen in Cambodia that I would not want to do, so perhaps the factories are better work environments. Anyway, you can think of these girls on their way to work when you wear your Cambodian-made clothing.
Beyond Phnom Penh, the drive was pretty. Green fields dotted by trees with cloudy moutains in the distance. We passed one small farming village after another. People were passing the time like they have for generations-planting rice, taking cattle out to pasture, planting gardens,
sleeping in hammocks under the house. Outside of PP, the country feels very unsophisticated. At our one gas station stop we were served by ladies who had all worn their pajamas to work. This is convenient for the frequent nap-taking that happens between customers (and who can blame them with the unrelenting heat?) Many men wore no more than underwear (again, who can blame them?)
We made the Thai border by 11:00 and quickly realized that we were one paper short of what we needed to take the van into Thailand. After much calling back to the school, we managed to get what we needed and be on our way to Koh Chang by 1:00. When we got close to the ferry to the island we joined a traffic jam. We hadn't realized that this was a holiday week-end and thousands of people from Bangkok would be joining us for the week-end on Koh Chang. It was a couple of hours before we found out how long the line for the ferry was and when we did, I realized that it would be another couple of hours before we actually got on the ferry. At this point, I abandoned poor Eric. Even though it was a cloudy day, it was still pretty hot in the van and we couldn't open the windows as the notoriously hungry and malarial border mosquitoes joined us every time they had the opportunity. I walked to the pier where the rain and cool wind off the ocean kept the mosquitoes at bay. In spite of the wind and the constant shifting of cars it really was pleasant to sit by the ocean. We made it to the island within six hours of arriving at the ferry.
The resort where the wedding was held was really lovely and
all night we heard the sounds of storms For us, who have been waiting for the rains in Phnom Penh, it was a lovely sound. For the rest of the family and friends visiting from Europe, East Asia and America, it had made their vacation less than ideal. Most had been on the island for many days and it had rained and stormed for most of that time, making the usually island activities very difficult or impossible. Thankfully, the wedding day was as perfect as it could be for the month of May. It was sunny and bright, but cooler than it would have been without the previous days of rain. Though everyone else was very hot, for us, it was cool compared to Phnom Penh (probably low-90s instead of upper 90s). The wedding was very small, but it was really lovely. With only 20 or so people, everyone contributed in some way to the wedding. Here is a picture of a fun activity organized by the Dutch contingent (the bride is from the Netherlands).
After lunch everyone headed for the pool, including the bride and groom still in their wedding clothes. The bride's dress didn't seem the worse for the chlorine:) Around dinner time Eric & I, the only guests with a vehicle, drove the new couple to their honeymoon destination.
The next day, we decided to beat the rush off the island and leave in the morning. Unfortunately, many others had the same idea. This time it was sunny and much hotter than the day we had arrived. Gabe & I abandoned Eric shortly after we realized how long the ferry line was. We waited for a little while in an open-air restaurant, but it was too hot to stay for long. I paid the cook at the restaurant to drive me to the pier on his moto. We thought we would wait there, but the only shelter was a very warm warehouse. Gabe & I got on the first ferry 10 minutes later and sailed across to the mainland. Even the Thai people were hot on our shaded ferry ride which tells you how hot the day was. Once on land, Gabe & I paid $1.50 for a ride in the back of a covered pick-up to the nearest town. The pick-up stopped at a KFC which was where we spent the rest of the day until Eric arrived. Judging by the number of pregnant women in KFC, it must have been one of the few air-conditioned refuges in town. Long-suffering Eric had to wait in line for about 5 hours. It was too hot to keep the car running so every time the traffic stopped he got out and took shelter under the trees on either side of the road. We drove the border as quickly as possible, but it was still 4:30 when we finally made it through immigration. It was a slow evening at immigration and the officials wanted to hear all about our trip.
The road beyond the border goes through a large national forest in the Cardamom mountains. It is a lonely drive on winding roads and people
usually do not recommend driving it at night. With darkness only 2 hours away, we realized we'd have to stay the night at the border. The best accomodation option was the casino right over the border. Gambling is against the law in Thailand so the Cambodians have built a large casino and hotel right over the border. Although it was depressing to see people gambling for 10 hours at a time, the hotel was on a lovely, lonely stretch of beach. Gabe enjoyed playing in the surf and we had a gorgeous sunset to end a pretty uncomfortable day. Oddly enough, this was the only time we were in the ocean on our island week-end.
The next day we left early and made it back in time for Eric's afternoon classes. We also came back to a house with no electricity, but that's another story.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Dangerous job
Friday, May 14, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
March and April
I don't have any pictures of March. There wasn't much exciting happening in March. Hot season started and we just plugged away at work. Most of March is spent thinking about the long break in April and what has to happen before the break, then preparing. The 2nd of April we left for Thailand to attend our group mission conference. This is an annual get-together for the members of our regional group. It's always good to reconnect with members from other countries and to hear what God is doing. We arrived on a Friday night and were shocked by the traffic we encountered. We had planned that we would have 2 hours to get from the airport to the train station in another part of Bangkok. Our taxi driver pronounced this impossible and told us we'd be better off driving 2 hours north to the next train stop and embarking there. The heavy traffic volume was due to the large protests happening in Bangkok. Lots of people were coming into town to join the "Red shirt" protests. Thankfully, the traffic thinned out and we made it to the train station with one minute to spare. Then the train was 1 1/2 hours late:)
Conference was a really nice time and Eric, especially, enjoyed the chance to see some of his former students before they graduate. One of the sad realities of our life is that these students
become sort of like family over the years that we get to know them and then we never see them again. It is rare for us to ever see them again once they leave to start life in their home countries. This was a particularly sad year as we said good-bye to a boy from New Zealand who lived with us for a short time. We have known him since he was 9, have gone on many vacations with his family and he was part of our family. It's hard to know when and if we'll see him again. Sad:( This year's graduating class also included our next-door neighbor and Gabe's favorite baby-sitter since he was 3 (the same person) On the plus side, these are some spectacular kids and it's wonderful to see the people they've become. We're excited to see what
they'll do with their lives. Here's a picture of us praying for the kids at conference.
After conference we spent a few days in Chiang Mai and then headed back to Bangkok. We stayed down in the city center for one night. We were a bit nervous as we were in the heart of the protest area and just a few days before many people had been shot during the protests. However, it was the New Year holiday and everyone, including the red-shirts, was celebrating. Here's a picture close to our hotel. As you can see, it's water-play pandemonium. Poor Eric went to check his e-mail at a cafe and this
is how he looked when he came back.
In past years Gabe has often been scared by the water fight, but this year he took is water gun everywhere he went and really enjoyed Songkran.
Conference was a really nice time and Eric, especially, enjoyed the chance to see some of his former students before they graduate. One of the sad realities of our life is that these students
After conference we spent a few days in Chiang Mai and then headed back to Bangkok. We stayed down in the city center for one night. We were a bit nervous as we were in the heart of the protest area and just a few days before many people had been shot during the protests. However, it was the New Year holiday and everyone, including the red-shirts, was celebrating. Here's a picture close to our hotel. As you can see, it's water-play pandemonium. Poor Eric went to check his e-mail at a cafe and this
In past years Gabe has often been scared by the water fight, but this year he took is water gun everywhere he went and really enjoyed Songkran.
We returned to a quiet and steamy Phnom Penh 2 weeks after we left. It has grown steadily hotter as the weeks have gone by, but we now have only 5 more weeks of school until we can take a break!
Monday, May 03, 2010
February pics
Here I am, trying to get caught up on blog posts again. To summarize-February was a month of being sick with amoeba and other digestive diseases for the whole family. March was busy preparation for April, which is sort of like December in America. Khmer new year (in April) is the biggest holiday of the year and everything sort of shuts down during that time. Most people travel and even if you stay home, it's too hot to get much of anything done. So here's February. We did manage to enjoy many things that happened in February in spite of the illness: "Spirit Week"-It wasn't actually called spirit week, but it didn't really have a name, so Spirit week is the best equivalent of what it actually was. The entire week was a competition between three "houses" made of up of the students from preschool-12. The houses were randomly assigned and had kids from all grades in them. I assume that the idea of competing houses comes from the time when kids went to boarding school and lived in different houses. Anyway, school mostly went on as usual with competitions at the beginning of every school day. One was a crazy hair competition and Gabe decided to shave a mohawk. It looked pretty crazy and the next day we had to shave it all off because his hair looked like it had been cut with a weed-whacker.
The last day of the week was a sports competition day. Gabe won a green ribbon for his house in the long jump. This competition was held far outside of town at a college campus and many of the students spent a good part of their day watching the crazy foreigners run in the hot sun. I'm always amazed that the kids can put so much energy into competing when it's so hot. We did go through hundreds, if not thousands, of bottles of water that day. For this day, lots of kids who are part of Hope's distance learning program came in from the provinces to take part.
Also during February we had camp week. This week is designed for the older students to do the field work portion of their classes. However, they have programs for the younger kids as well. Eric went to Rabbit Island and Kep with his kids. Rabbit Island is beautiful, but very undeveloped and the accomodations were very basic. In spite of this, they seemed to have a really fun trip and I assume, got their work done. One of Eric's ice-breaker activities was to have teams design a rain-proof shelter and a sea-worthy boat for the 7 dwarves action-figures. Some went above and beyond and designed entire resorts for their dwarf.
Kep is a town on the edge of a national park known for its natural beauty. 100 years ago French colonialists built villas and plantations here and made it into a little Riviera for themselves. The Khmer Rouge hated that sort of thing and destroyed it. The ruined and blackened mansions tell 100 years of history very succinctly.
Also during February we had camp week. This week is designed for the older students to do the field work portion of their classes. However, they have programs for the younger kids as well. Eric went to Rabbit Island and Kep with his kids. Rabbit Island is beautiful, but very undeveloped and the accomodations were very basic. In spite of this, they seemed to have a really fun trip and I assume, got their work done. One of Eric's ice-breaker activities was to have teams design a rain-proof shelter and a sea-worthy boat for the 7 dwarves action-figures. Some went above and beyond and designed entire resorts for their dwarf.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Antipodes
I have some pictures to post, but instead I'll post this useless trivia. As a kid, didn't you always wonder, "If I tunneled straight down, where would I come out on the other side of the world." Now we can know the answer to that question. The answer, in my case, is somewhat disappointing. If I had tunneled straight down from my house just outside Chicago, I would have ended up in the ocean somewhere between western Australia and the French Southern and Antarctic Islands. Now if Gabe decides to take on this venture and tunnel straight down from our house in Phnom Penh, which I don't think he will as we have only cement to tunnel through, he would end up just south of the Pui Pui Protected forest of Peru which apparently is a mountainous jungle crisscrossed by streams and torrents. Even though it is of no benefit, it's nice to think of such a lovely jungle just below this urban jungle.
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
The Superbowl
Gabe was talking to Grandpa & Grandma on Sunday (Saturday night US time) and they said, "Tomorrow is the Superbowl." Gabe pumped his fist and said, "Yes!!!" I said, "Gabe, do you know what the Superbowl is?" He said, "Yes, it's a big soccer game where one team wins a cup."
No, son, that's the World Cup.
Eric, worried about Gabe's Americaness, determined that Gabe would get up at 6:30 the next morning to watch the Superbowl with him. Gabe actually enjoyed it and pretty much changed his alliance every time points were scored.
No, son, that's the World Cup.
Eric, worried about Gabe's Americaness, determined that Gabe would get up at 6:30 the next morning to watch the Superbowl with him. Gabe actually enjoyed it and pretty much changed his alliance every time points were scored.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Moving
We decided to travel over land to Chiang Mai. It would have been nicer to travel by plane, but the bus is cheaper and also, we thought it would help us figure out how to get our stuff back, since the plane would not be an option with so much stuff. We left Phnom Penh at 6:30 in the morning and here is a picture of Eric & Gabe trying to stay awake after getting up at 5:00.
Within a short time of being on the bus, Eric texted
me that we should have brought face masks. Everyone on the bus seemed to be sick. Looking around, I realized that many people were just motion sick. It isn't uncommon, in Cambodia, for people to be completely unused to traveling in an enclosed vehicle. Quite a few people were vomiting throughout the trip and at one point, we had to stop for more trash bags. Unfortunately, the bus company provides everyone with an opportunity to eat every two hours. Here's us at one of the rest stops. They have food ready to eat. In one case, Gabe found the available snacks very unpalatable. Here he's looking at a pan of fried whole baby birds.
By the time
we'd been on the bus 4 hours, I decided we had to find another way back. After another 4 hours, we made it into Thailand. For reasons we never understood, we were put into a taxi for the remaining 4 hours to Bangkok. We shared the taxi with a very nice French couple. We were just glad they weren't car sick. We spent the night in Bangkok and took a train 12 hours to Chiang Mai. In all, it took us 24 hours to get to Chiang Mai.
Once we got to Chiang Mai, we had to sort through our stuff. Inevitably, we find ourselves wondering what madness prompted us to save some of the things that we saved. Thankfully, Grace was having a yard sale that week-end and
we were able to donate about one cubic meter of our stuff. Another cubic meter went back into storage and we thought we could take a cubic meter back with us. Now we had to get it to Phnom Penh. We wanted to rent a van, but this is expensive. Thankfully, collegues from Phnom Penh agreed to share the van and expense with us.
The trip through Thailand was really nice and we arrived at the border in 12 hours. We found a seedy little hotel and stayed the night.
In order to avoid the bus ride in Cambodia, we had agreed to bring chemicals for the school lab across the border. The school would then send a van for us. It was slightly risky, as we did not really have permission to do this, but we hoped that the one box of chemicals would be hidden by all of our other stuff. First we had to find the chemicals. Eric wandered around on the initial directions given for an hour and a half and was unable to find the shipping company where we were supposed to pick up the chemicals. He came back hot and tired from walking around the dusty town and I decided to ask some people about this shipping company. No one knew the company, but we were able to figure out the neighborhood that it was in, and it seemed to be very close to the border. After some discussion, we decided to pick up the chemicals on our way to the border. The van, by this time, was returned to Chiang Mai, so we had to find a truck. In Chiang Mai, as in many other Thai cities there are numerous truck taxis driving around looking for customers. Unfortunately, in the border town of Aranya Prathet there are only little tuk-tuks. So I decided to ask anyone who stopped if they had a truck we could rent.
Many tuk-tuk drivers stopped and insisted that they could carry our very heavy 20 boxes on their canvas roofs and could squeeze six of us into
on small bench seat. Finally, one many said his cousin had a truck and could take us to the border. For $10 we go the perfect truck. Once we were loaded up, we headed to the neighborhood of the shipping company. Unfortunately, we didn't really have an address or clear directions to the shipping company, so we were relying on talking to them on our cell phones once we got to the neighborhood. Within two minutes of talking to them, our cell phone minutes ran out. We stopped at a shop to get more minutes, but it just so happened that our phone company could not add new minutes that morning. Here is Eric waiting behind the truck near the shop for me to get new minutes.
So without a cell phone, we had no choice but to wander the streets of the neighborhood looking for shipping company. After about 10 minutes, one of our friends says, "I think I saw a cardboard box on the porch of that house back there." With nothing else to go on, we checked it out. The house looked nothing like a shipping company and the people at the house watched nonchalantly while we tried to get past their attack dogs. Once we actually made it up to the porch, we saw that the box had "Hope International School" written across it. Hallelujah! It was miraculous that we found it.
So that's our saga of moving. Now we have to do it again in a few days.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Cheers and boos for living cheap
Now for the boos: I don't get ice cream sandwiches as much because I'm never at the gas station. Also, our house is built very cheaply and and last night gabe broke the faucet off at the neck with his head. His head doesn't hurt at all, but that's the second faucet that has broken off with a minimum of force.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Noise
Anyway, I was up on the roof and watching this incredible rain storm sweep across the city. The rain was almost horizontal and the noise was incredible is it beat on the our roof and the roofs of houses all around. To me, it's a beautiful thing and fresh air it brings just adds to the pleasure of watching a storm. I took these pictures, but it in no way captured the overpowering nature of the storm. Of course, it's a little sobering to realized that these storms come from the same systems that have been devastating the Philippines, but it's still awe-inspiring. I wish I could better capture it.
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